The Big Smoke

Do you know what pisses me off? When people don’t realize that books don’t work as movies. Books are experienced differently from films. A good adaptation is always possible, but it’s going to have to be changed to suit the very, very different medium.

That famous director dude people love that made "The Shining" understood this. I always hear bitchy fanboys/fangirls bemoan how oppressively oppressive and life shattering the film was. You know what? I saw that movie without having read the book, and I thought it was one of the best horror movies ever. I read the book a few years later, and I said to myself, "Yeah, they changed it a lot, and took out half the book, but what an ugly convoluted movie a loyal adaption of this very nice book would have made."

 
I just found out that Terry Gilliam, of Monty Python/12 Monkeys/Fear and Loathing in Los Vegas-fame, was J.K. Rowling’s first choice as director of the Harry Potter films, and he wanted in. But, the studio refused and instead went with Christopher Columbus, of Home Alone/Bicentennial Man fame. Why? Probably because Christopher Columbus has no fucking imagination, and would make movies for the book fans, and not try to make a good movie.

I’ve never read the books, and I fucking hated the first three Harry Potter movies, though I was dragged to them all by fangirls. Do you know why the fanboys liked those movies? Because it reminded them of how good the books were. They didn’t have to enjoy them as films because they knew every fucking detail anyway. Now, Goblet of Fire I really liked. It was really well paced, for one, which the other movies lacked entirely. It was a movie in it’s own right, not mearly a shadow of a book. But how did the fanboys react?

The greatest disappointment of all though? I just found out that in the Tim Burton Batman film, The Joker was supposed to be played David Bowie. I don’t know what part of otherwise talented Tim Burton’s brain compelled him to not follow up on this inspiration, but I’m guessing it’s the same part that lead him to make Planet of the Apes. Whatever, I blame the comic book fanboys.